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jeanniejeanniejeannie.co.uk  Children's Books & Writing Stories Once upon a time...

NOTHING LASTS FOREVER – ALL CHANGE

 

R U JOKING, GRANDAD BLOG

&

GRANDAD'S PICTURE of the DAY

 

FRIDAY 22nd SEPTEMBER 2017

 

Nothing lasts forever, not even a £10 note or £1 coin. Life is all about change. To make life truly meaningful we need to keep moving forward, experiencing new and different things. Do not become a “stuck in the mud”.

 

So we are so excited to tell you that we practice what we preach and tomorrow this website is moving onwards and hopefully upwards. We are planning some changes one of which is a change to our domain name. You’ll find full details here tomorrow.

 

The website will also look a little different too. Hopefully it will be easier to navigate.

 

So I’m afraid you’ll have to contain yourself for just over 24 hours and all will be revealed by 12 noon tomorrow!!! Yes, that is SATURDAY 23rd September 2017!

 

ANOTHER BIT OF GOOD NEWS

 

Neil Gaiman is one of Grandad’s favourite writers and the following has been announced this week:

 

Writer Neil Gaiman has delighted fans by hinting that he will soon appear as the first ever voice of cat Snowball II on The Simpsons.

 

Usually known for his work behind the camera, he told followers via Twitter that he will feature in this year’s Halloween special of the hit US cartoon, and challenged them to guess which character he will play.

 

He started by offering the cryptic clue: “I am on the Simpsons Treehouse of Horror this year. I do not play myself this time. Instead I voice a character who has not spoken before.”

 

While some incorrectly assumed it would be baby Maggie, he retweeted one follower who suggested “Snowball II” and congratulated them with: “You guessed”.

 

Revealing more about the upcoming special, which traditionally parodies classic horror stories, he shared a picture of Lisa Simpson and her cat crawling through a tunnel leading from a door.

 

Most guessed the episode will be a take on Henry Selick’s 2009 cult animation Coraline and shared their approval of the choice.

 

“That is awesome!” wrote Louise Scollay, while Samantha Bosch simply replied: “YES!!!!!”

 

The idea does not come as a surprise to many, as the film is inspired by Gaiman’s 2002 novella about the young girl who stumbles across a mysterious parallel world when she moves to a new home.

 

The American Gods creator also made headlines this week as filming began on the TV adaptation of Good Omens, which he co-wrote with the late Terry Pratchett.

 

 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

 

"I wonder if we are given kids to teach or to learn from?" Author Unknown, from Big Mud Puddles and Sunny Yellow Dandelions 

 

HAPPINESS IS…

 

Happiness is…looking out of the window through the mist to view autumnal colours of a September daybreak

 

GRANDAD’S ONE LINER JOKE OF THE DAY

 

“It all starts innocently, mixing chocolate and Rice Krispies, but before you know it you’re adding raisins and marshmallows – it’s a rocky road.” Olaf Falafel (2016)

THURSDAY 21ST SEPTEMBER 2017

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GRANDAD'S PICTURE of the DAY

 

BIN THE DIN

 

I have found to qualify as a grandad I had to lose my hair. Also, my sight has almost had to go, I have become old and eccentric. I also have to fake slow and pretend I cannot operate modern day smart phones, TVs and gadgets. I have to make noises as I stand up or walk up stairs.

 

The biggest thing about being a grandad is the deafness. You do need it to blot out the horrendous din grand children make. But as I have complained about before, I want to ear well in restaurants. I want to thoroughly enjoy the restaurant/pub/coffee shop experience, that means hearing what those who are with me are saying. But usually you can’t because of noise and the acoustics.

 

There are few places I go where I get a wonderful coffe/meal experience and now the charity Action on Hearing back me on this :

 

What a din! High Street chain restaurants have become so noisy that some are louder than lawnmowers

By Sean Poulter Consumer Affairs Editor For The Daily Mail

 

Charity Action on Hearing Loss measured the noise levels in restaurants chains

 

It found levels of around 90dB – the equivalent to eating next to a motorbike

 

The highest figure was in a Patisserie Valerie cafe at a deafening 97.8dB

 

You’d likely have a few words with the maitre d’ if you sat down to a meal and a waiter started up a lawnmower next to you.

 

But that’s the equivalent of what diners are putting up with due to the excessive din at some restaurant chains, a study has found.

 

The situation has become so bad many customers are deciding to get a takeaway rather than put up with the racket. Loud music, which forces people to shout so they can be heard, is turning an evening out into a chore, researchers said.

 

The charity Action on Hearing Loss measured the levels of noise in restaurants chains. It found decibel levels of around 90dB – the equivalent to eating next to a motorbike . And the problem is exacerbated by minimalist decor, such as hard floors and bare walls, which ensure every crash and bang is magnified.

 

The charity Action on Hearing Loss measured the levels of noise in restaurant chains. It found decibel levels of around 90dB – the equivalent to eating next to a motorbike, a lawnmower, a whirring food processor or someone using a hand saw.

 

The highest figure was in a Patisserie Valerie cafe at 97.8dB, while the figure in a Wagamama hit 90.1dB. 

The charity says restaurant chains which fail to dampen the noise are their own worst enemies, because it is driving people away. Its research found 91 per cent of people would avoid returning to a noisy place. At the same time, 79 per cent have left a restaurant early due to the clamour.

 

The charity says restaurant chains which fail to dampen the noise are their own worst enemies, because it is driving people away and 43 per cent of potential diners said they were increasingly choosing to stay in for a peaceful takeaway rather than going out.

 

Paul Breckell, the charity’s boss, said: ‘With an increasing variety of takeaway options and the intrusive background noise exacerbated by fashionable hard surfaces, it’s no wonder customers are opting to stay in.’

 

Patisserie Valerie said: ‘All our kitchens are enclosed and we have a policy of no background music in stores. The decibel readings stated appear to have been taken in one store on one specific date and time so cannot give an accurate reflection all stores in our portfolio.’

 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

 

Take a risk or otherwise you won't know what you missed. Levi Strauss

 

HAPPINESS IS…

 

Happiness is…a great restaurant with superb food and an ambiance where I can hear every word uttered by those I am with.

 

 

GRANDAD’S ONE LINER JOKE OF THE DAY

 

“Oh my goodness, mega drama the other day: My dishwasher stopped working! Yup, his visa expired.” Alexander Henry Buchanan-Dunlop (2014)

 

WEDNESDAY 20th SEPTEMBER 2017

 

 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

 

The most wasted of all days is one without laughter. E E Cummings

 

HAPPINESS IS…

 

Happiness is…recovering data on the computer you thought you’d lost

 

GRANDAD’S ONE LINER JOKE OF THE DAY

 

“I saw a documentary on how ships are kept together. Riveting!” Stewart Francis

 

TUESDAY 19th SEPTEMBER 2017

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GRANDAD'S PICTURE of the DAY

 

THE HANDMAID'S EMMY

 

Not only as a grandad but throughout life I have always  really enjoyed, and continue to do so, the American Award programmes. The season is now well under way with the Emmys taking place last Sunday. "The Handmaid's Tale" was the big winner of the night taking home five Emmys, having previously won three at the Creative Arts Emmy Awards.  Here are the main awards:

 

Outstanding drama series

"The Handmaid's Tale" *WINNER

 

Outstanding comedy series

"Veep" *WINNER

 

Outstanding lead actor in a drama series

Sterling K. Brown, "This Is Us" *WINNER

Anthony Hopkins, "Westworld"

 

Outstanding lead actress in a drama series

Elisabeth Moss, "The Handmaid's Tale" *WINNER

 

Outstanding supporting actor in a drama series

John Lithgow , "The Crown" * WINNER

 

Outstanding supporting actress in a drama series

Ann Dowd, "The Handmaid's Tale" *WINNER

 

Outstanding lead actor in a comedy series

Donald Glover, "Atlanta" *WINNER

William H. Macy, "Shameless"

 

Outstanding lead actress in a comedy series

Julia Louis-Dreyfus, "Veep" *WINNER

 

Outstanding supporting actor in a comedy series

Alec Baldwin, "Saturday Night Live" *WINNER

 

Outstanding supporting actress in a comedy series

Kate McKinnon, "Saturday Night Live" *WINNER

 

Outstanding variety talk series

"Last Week Tonight With John Oliver" *WINNER

"The Late Late Show With James Corden"

 

Outstanding reality-competition program

"The Voice" *WINNER

 

Outstanding directing for a comedy series

Donald Glover, "Atlanta"*WINNER

 

Outstanding writing for a drama series

Bruce Miller, "The Handmaid's Tale" *WINNER

 

Outstanding writing for a comedy series

Aziz Ansari and Lena Waithe, "Master of None"*WINNER

 

Outstanding directing for a drama series

Reed Morano, "The Handmaid's Tale" *WINNER

 

 

 

TUESDAY 19th SEPTEMBER 2017

 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

 

Enthusiasm is the electricity of life. How do you get it? You act enthusiastic until you make it a habit. Gordon Parks

 

HAPPINESS IS…

 

Happiness is…falling asleep to the sound of raindrops tapping at your bedroom window

 

GRANDAD’S ONE LINER JOKE OF THE DAY

 

“I was raised as an only child, which really annoyed my sister.” Will Marsh

 

 

MONDAY 18th SEPTEMBER 2017

 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

 

A smile is an inexpensive way to change your looks. Charles Gordy

 

HAPPINESS IS…

 

Happiness is…using our free bus pass on the tram which takes us directly to hospital for our appointment when we used to have to drive for miles spend many frustrating hours looking for a parking space and then pay the earth to park.

 

GRANDAD’S ONE LINER JOKE OF THE DAY

 

“Hey, if anyone knows how to fix some broken hinges, my door’s always open.” Paul F. Taylor

SUNDAY 17th SEPTEMBER 2017

 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

 

 

Take a break. Being the best also requires you to take breaks when needed. Make sure you rest when needed. Doing so lets you walk the longer road ahead.

 

HAPPINESS IS…

 

Happiness is…a serious conversation with a young child

 

GRANDAD’S ONE LINER JOKE OF THE DAY

 

“I think the bravest thing I’ve ever done is misjudge how much shopping I want to buy and still not go back to get a basket.” Stuart Laws

 

SATURDAY 16th SEPTEMBER 2017

 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

 

Laugh more.  Are you reading this with a straight face? Smile and have fun.

 

 

HAPPINESS IS…

 

Happiness is…a Chinese takeaway with every member of close family – all our children, their spouses and all our grandchildren

 

GRANDAD’S ONE LINER JOKE OF THE DAY

 

“I was playing chess with my friend and he said, ‘Let’s make this interesting’. So we stopped playing chess.” Matt Kirshen (2011)

Friday

15th SEPTEMBER 2017

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GRANDAD'S PICTURE of the DAY

 

SLEEP GLORIOUS SLEEP

 

Today’s Picture of the Day is the front cover of the Daily Mail.

 

The reason I have chosen it is because of the secondary headline and photograph: “Clooney: The twins make me cry with tiredness four times a day”.

 

This is a joyous headline, one of the best I have ever read. It just goes to prove whoever you are and however much money you have, money and position and celebrity status and power still cannot get you through that sleep depravity of having a young child.

 

We have a grandson that habitually wakes and starts his day at 5.30am. Sometimes, because he can, he will awake at 4.30am.

 

I get the blame for his actions. Why, may I ask? Because I’m the early bird that catches the worm. I’m always up early. Even though I’m retired I still get up at 5.30am. In my youth I used to open up a newsagent’s shop at 5.30am, before going on to my day job and I loved it, every early morning minute of it. The best time of the day and my life.

 

But I do wilt later in the day and the George Clooney syndrome catches up with both me and Mamma.

 

Our eldest daughter used to be terrible to get to sleep at night. She is forty years old, now and I still feel tired from trying to get her off to sleep when she was a child. She is an avid reader, always has been. She used to wake in the night and rather than feeds, demand reads. Desperate as I was for sleep and knowing I had to be alert and awake for a demanding job next morning I would try skipping a few pages. But our daughter would know the book off by heart and say, “No, Daddy, you missed a bit.”

 

Her son, Rory has just had his first week of full days at school, for which he was so ready. But his tiredness has been slowly building, and last night, Thursday, at 6.45pm he said he was tired and ready for bed.

 

Both our daughters are school teachers, so I have no worries with them crying through lack of sleep like George Clooney, in teacher training they are taught how to survive without sleep, aren’t they? Surely, it is part of the job.

 

 

FRIDAY 15th SEPTEMBER 2017

 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

 

Overcome procrastination. Procrastination is a huge waste of your time (and your life). Get rid of it once and for all.

 

 

HAPPINESS IS…

 

Happiness is…a Chinese takeaway meal

 

GRANDAD’S ONE LINER JOKE OF THE DAY

 

“When I was younger I felt like a man trapped inside a woman’s body. Then I was born.” Yianni (2015)

 

Thursday

14th SEPTEMBER 2017

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GRANDAD'S PICTURE of the DAY

 

CONKERS & POODLES

 

Granddaughter Freya, as I have said quite a few times began school last week.

 

Yesterday was our first childminding day with the new school-taking regime. The routine was all new and strange to us but she soon, very confidently showed us what to do and where to go.

 

That left us with grandson George for a full day, 9.00am until 3.15pm.

 

This one on one time we are going to get with George is very valuable to us. After Freya was born, for 2½ years we spent a lot of time with her one to one and cementing a solid bond.

 

Freya and George always see us together. We try to give them both equal attention. But now we will be looking after George solo for 6¼ hours per week. There should be some quality bonding going on with him too.

 

The bonding was highly successful. The proof of the pudding was that George was in his daddy’s arms as we left and he was crying real tears and reaching out his arms to us. Yes! Result!

 

Walking home from school with Freya was amazing grandparents/grandchildren memory making time. The four of us collected hundreds of conkers (horse chestnuts). Many were still in their green spikey protective wrapping. A fantastic autumnal pastime. An activity I did with my grandad that I have fond memories of.

 

I was so dismayed to learn that you can no longer play conkers at school, due to health and safety issues or political correctness, one of today’s crazy reasons to stop children having fun.

 

I was hopeless at sports and games at school. But I did end up with a champion conker one year and I was always good at marbles, another olde worlde children’s game.

 

Freya was so excited that we had collected so many conkers and we polished them until you could see your face in them. But for what reason? Just to keep them as a treasure? What was beautiful was she put many of them in her special treasure box.

 

At the end of the day I suppose it did create an amazing memory.

 

As did the puddle jumping. (Is that still acceptable or have Health & Safety moved in to stop that too.) There were lots of huge puddles and mini streams of water running down the roads due to a major downpour earlier in the afternoon. Freya was diligently and capably jumping over the puddles. She wore brand new, shiny black shoes she had had to go back to school in and was determined not to get them dirty because she likes them so much. Me, being Grandad jumped over each puddle (or poodle – grandad joke) only to fail and make a huge splash in the middle of each one.

 

Freya and George found that hilarious. I found it good fun too.

 

It’s brilliant being a Grandad because you can just splash in puddles and no one cares. In fact it is expected of you.

 

 

THURSDAY 14th SEPTEMBER 2017

 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

 

My father taught me a good lesson: Don't get to low when things go wrong. And don't get too high when things are good. Robert Perish

 

HAPPINESS IS…

 

Happiness is…5pm Friday afternoon

 

GRANDAD’S ONE LINER JOKE OF THE DAY

 

Daughter: Mommy, what's it like to have the most awesome daughter in the world ?

Mother: I don't know, ask your grandmother.

WEDNESDAY 13th SEPTEMBER 2017

 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

 

Never let a dress code get in the way of fun socks.

 

HAPPINESS IS…

 

Happiness is…Checking out who has best Saturday early evening TV ratings Strictly Come Dancing or X Factor

 

GRANDAD’S ONE LINER JOKE OF THE DAY

 

We are all time travellers moving at the speed of exactly 60 minutes per hour

Tuesday 12th SEPTEMBER 2017

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GRANDAD'S PICTURE of the DAY

 

On Saturday my daughter was away with friends celebrating, yet again, her big birthday (how big is it?). I took pity on her husband and did my bit for him and the environment. I did my Grandad duty and looked after Rory and Ewan for a couple of hours whilst my son in law planted a tree.

 

Simple, you would think, as I thought. Wrong.

 

I’ve never really child minded when the parents have been hovering in the background. Big mistake. Huge mistake.

 

I did not realise how much I bent the rules. No, lets be straight on this, how much I broke the rules. It does no harm when it’s just me and the boys. What goes on at Grandad’s stays at Grandad’s, as someone famous celebrity is quoted as saying. And because the little ones find my most endearing trait is that I break Mum and Dad’s rules it goes against the grain a little when I don’t.

They seem to think the rule is the older you are the more you can overrule anyone younger than you. That’s how it works in nursery, in school, and at home.

 

But sorry kids, it don’t work that way when Grandad comes to your house, Mum and Dad’s rules remain law (if they are in). No, it’s not that I’m scared. What can they do to me? Put me on the naughty step at the very worst.

 

Usually when Mamma and me child mind and Mum and Dad have gone out Ewan gets a bottle out of one of us. Ok, Mum and Dad says “No, he’s over bottles now”. But we think it’s just ordinary milk, just a drink gives him a bit of old fashioned comfort and keeps the peace. Ewan loves it. The highlight of our visit.

So when I got there Saturday, Ewan grabbed me by the hand and dragged me to the kitchen saying bot-bot. He took me to the fridge and then to where the bottles were stored. But I couldn’t give him one. Dad was there in the garden.

 

Ewan was not happy and began his drama queen crying. He knows that panics me.

 

I’m nervous. His dad will think I am not capable of looking after him. If he has to come in from the garden it defeats the object of me being here and I will feel useless. I know Ewan loves the “Madagascar” film which he calls, “Lion”. So I put it on the TV.

 

A fragile calm overcomes him. But Rory doesn’t want it on.  He wants “Planet Earth II” and protests. His Dad comes in to investigate. He takes “Madagascar” off and puts “Planet Earth II” on. Ewan is now in explosive drama queen mode, screaming “Lion! Lion!” Rory contentedly watches TV, jumping up and down with excitement as the lions chases the wilderbeast, or whatever, I’m too stressed to notice. Unfortunately, Rory accidentally jumps on Ewans legs which are prostrate on the floor as part of his dramatic routine.

 

I realised it had hurt BIG time as he stopped crying for a moment to take in a massive intake of breath to scream the house down. Emergency!!! I scooped him up. Rushed to the kitchen. Grabbed a bottle. Filled it with milk. Screwed the teat on and stuck it in Ewan’s mouth.

 

Two seconds later when the said bottle was drained I took Rory to the kitchen table and got out all the best artist papers, paints, felt tips and glues, dumped them on the best kitchen table cloth and said to him paint me your best ever picture.

 

“But I’m hungry Grandad.” Said Rory.

 

I opened the goody cupboard, filled with chocolate, biscuits, crisps, choc-choc bears. The works.

 

“You can eat what ever you want from this cupboard if Ewan can have “Madagasca 2” on.” I said.

 

“Anything?” He asked not believing his ears.

 

“Everything.” I said.

 

“And I can paint too? Are you joking me, Grandad?”

 

“No, Deadly serious.”

 

“Ok!” And he dived into the cupboard.

 

So as Ewan showed me how to use the remote control to find “Madagasca 2” on Netflix finally Grandad power brought peace and calm to the household.

 

All it needed was Grandad being Grandad, the silly old bugger.

 

PICTURE OF THE DAY - Whilst surfing the net I have often seen this picture but not with these words. I've often seen the same expression on my grandchildren's faces. I am very sure the words have gone through their minds too.

 

Tuesday 12th SEPTEMBER 2017

 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

 

Blessed is the person who is too busy to worry in the daytime and too sleepy to worry at night. Leo Aikman

 

HAPPINESS IS…

 

Happiness is… love in an afternoon

 

GRANDAD’S ONE LINER JOKE OF THE DAY

 

When you choke a smurf, what colour does it turn?

Monday 11th SEPTEMBER 2017

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GRANDAD'S PICTURE of the DAY

 

Mamma and myself learn so much from our four grandchildren. We find that to be fantastic. We hope it works the other way too and they learn from us.

 

A couple of weeks ago granddaughter Freya showed me and told me about a fantastic book she had chosen from the library, Bubble and Squeak by James Mayhew  and  Clara Vulliamy. I was not aware of that book and I love it.

 

Yesterday grandson Rory came to tea and told me about a book his godmother had bought for him.

Both our daughters and son in laws did a great job choosing a well balanced gaggle (what is the collective noun for godparents, anyone?) of godparents for our grandchildren. Each godparent is so fantastic, bringing their own individual key skills and qualities to the changing mat.

 

Zany, hysterical humour I think needs to be an important part of my grandchilden’s lives. The godmother who bought this book provides that aspect brilliantly and Freya has a godmother that is an equal match when it comes to being the zaniest and funniest godmother in the world ever. Thankfully!

 

The book is Poo Bum by Stephanie Blake. I’m not sure I would have had the courage to buy it. I would have feared it being banned and me being criticised by Mum and Dad.

 

A brilliant book though, that so caught Rory’s imagination. So much so that it gave him so much laughter and excitement that he told me the whole story – jumping up and down (as he always does when he is excited about something) and laughing as he carefully chose his words to describe every aspect of the story to me.

 

To me that book is an almost perfect book. He loved the pictures in it, the story excited him so much, it made him laugh out loud, it held his attention and he retained it and retold it fluently. And it entertained Grandad, big time. And it would add to his communication skills as he told other people and his mates.

So many skills were used and he was so inspired from one thirty two page book. Brilliant! All demonstrating the importance of books.

 

I wish we had bought the book for him.

 

 

PHOTO OF THE DAY:

 

This is the Stage Door of the Theatre Royal, Brighton. One of the UK’s major theatres, where many top shows are staged. Looking at the photo, where’s the theatre if this is the Stage Door? I think Brighton Theatre Royal must be a living tardis. I’m impressed!

 

 

Monday 11th SEPTEMBER 2017

 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

 

If I were not a physicist, I would probably be a musician. I often think in music. I live my daydreams in music. I see my life in terms of music. Albert Einstein

 

HAPPINESS IS…

 

Happiness is…listening to a music track that makes those little hairs on the back of your neck stand up

 

GRANDAD’S ONE LINER JOKE OF THE DAY

 

Dyslexic man walks into a bra

 

SUNDAY 10th SEPTEMBER 2017

 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

 

 

Worry is the darkroom in which negatives can develop. Anon

 

 

HAPPINESS IS…

 

Happiness is….finding a brand new comedy series on TV that is hillarious (Rare)…

 

 

GRANDAD’S ONE LINER JOKE OF THE DAY

 

Whiteboards are remarkable.

 

 

 

 

Saturday 9th SEPTEMBER 2017

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GRANDAD'S PICTURE of the DAY

 

I spotted this story this week on the Daily Echo internet site which has excited me and inspired me so much as a grandad.

 

A Playmobil toy pirate ship launched by two young brothers in Aberdeenshire has sailed the high seas to Scandinavia.

 

Ollie Ferguson, eight, and Harry, five, from Turriff, first launched their Playmobil ship from Peterhead at the end of May.

 

It sailed hundreds of miles to Denmark, where a family sent it on its way. It then made it to Sweden and Norway.

 

The boys launched the pirate ship as part of a bucket list of adventures they have put together.

 

The ship, named Adventure, needed some adaptations before it was ready to tackle the North Sea.

 

A counterweight was added to help it stay upright and it was filled it with polystyrene to help it stay afloat.

 

After trials in a swimming pool, they took it to the coast and launched it into the waves.

 

It carries a message asking anyone who finds the boat to launch Adventure back into the sea.

 

Ollie and Harry have drawn up a bucket list of adventures they want to complete.

 

Their father, MacNeill Ferguson, said: "Everyone that has picked it up has been really kind and sent us photos and looked after it.

 

"It reached Denmark and then Sweden, where it was picked up by a lady who was sailing her own boat and found it in a tree. She was really kind and remade the sails for it.

 

"Then it was picked up by a Norwegian conservation vessel."

 

The story attracted interest in the Norwegian media, and Adventure is now being taken aboard the Christian Radich, a Norwegian full-rigged ship.

 

It will carry the vessel down to Cape Verde and then launch it, giving it the chance to sail across the Atlantic.

 

Me writing now:

 

Toys have tremendous adventures these days as any fan of the “Toy Story” films will tell you. But just think of the adventure this Pirate ship has had and is having. It proves anything is possible.

 

When the bit of plastic was turned into a toy ship I bet it was disappointed, “I wanted to be part of a real ship sailing the seven seas,” not realising it was going to be doing that anyway and as an actual boat. On a proper ship the plastic would only have been part of the trimmings. There’s a life lesson to be learned there.

 

I’m not sure that the pirate figures were left on board, but just imagine their adventure if they were.

 

What a book and film this will make. I wonder if anyone has bought the film eights, yet. I’d better get on with the book and screenplay.

 

The other inspiring thing was the “bucket list”. I’ve already done one for “One Year Old George”. Go to:101 THINGS TO DO BEFORE UR ONE

 

Bucket lists are so exciting and help you get the most from life.

 

 

SATURDAY 9th SEPTEMBER 2017

 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

 

Unless each day can be looked back upon by an individual as one in which he has some fun, some joy, some real satisfaction, that day is a loss. Dwight Eisenhower

 

HAPPINESS IS…

 

Happiness is…an afternoon tea a strawberry pavlova with fresh cream and a cup of Yorkshire tea

 

GRANDAD’S ONE LINER JOKE OF THE DAY

 

I had an argument with one of the seven dwarfs. He wasn’t happy.

Friday 8th SEPTEMBER 2017

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GRANDAD'S PICTURE of the DAY

 

A new era starts as my two eldest grandchildren have started school with no problems. They are treating it as if they’d always gone to school. That is how easily you take on these things at four years old. By the time you are 68 years old new things are stressful and a pain. But Mamma and me learn so much from our grandchildren and this is a biggy learn. Embrace change and new experience, take them in your stride and don’t stress.

 

Freya was up at quarter past six this morning, very excited about school. Apparently on reaching school she was embarrassed to kiss mum! 4 years old going on 14.

 

Rory skipped all the way to school and when he got to the playground he just ran off to play like the older children.

 

So all the worries and stresses for mums (and dads) and grandparents were totally unnecessary and can be allowed to subside. We can go off and search for new worries. And don’t worry, we’ll all find lots of other things to worry about.

 

I love technology but mobile/smart phones leave me cold and annoy me. But I love Whatsapp. I am constantly updated with what my grandchildren are doing as I receive photos and videos. It has been invaluable over this starting school week.

 

Rory’s school did a fantastic thing, they gave all the mums (& dads) of new starters a packet of biscuits some tea bags and a poem saying that they know it’s traumatic for them but go home have a biscuit and a cup of tea and put their feet up and relax as the school will look after their precious ones.

 

I think that is so reassuring and says so much about the school. For a start it says you’ve chosen the right school. A school which cares enough and thinks through the detail, if they do that they are going to give your children a wonderful journey of discovery through the education minefields.

 

I bet Prince George’s £17,000 a year school didn’t do that.

 

And talking about Prince George, his grandad, Prince Charles is a bit low key on his grandson starting school. No “R U Joking Grandad Blog” from him.

 

Other big celebrations this week is mine and Mamma’s wedding anniversary, today. A very important day. We hope this sets a brilliant example to our grandchildren (and children). Both Mamma and myself know that one of the most important things in life is all about relationships and the family unit.

 

We both missed that as children and love it now. I enjoy having a soul mate, a life partner, hopefully our grandchildren will, too. It gives us a very fulfilled happiness.

 

I love being original and creative and doing things that are fun and different. When I proposed to Mamma you just asked the question. I wish I’d have done it in front of the Christmas Tree at Time Square, New York or at an Elvis Concert in Las Vegas (Get Elvis to announce it) or at the top of Mount Everest.

 

Our wedding, although Mamma was an amazingly beautiful bride with a very fashionable hat that made her look stunning we had a traditional church job. How should we have done it? Italy, a cruise or halfway up a mountain like the couple in the picture.

 

Another lesson for grandchildren: if ever you get married be original, be creative, be different, be outrageous. Most of all create a memory!

FRIDAY 8th SEPTEMBER 2017

 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

 

It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all, in which case you have failed by default. J.K. Rowling

 

HAPPINESS IS…

 

Happiness is….reading the Yorkshire Post – the daily newspaper

 

GRANDAD’S ONE LINER JOKE OF THE DAY

 

Police were called to a day care where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.

 

THURSDAY 6th SEPTEMBER 2017

 

ARE U JOKING, GRANDAD BLOG

&

GRANDAD'S

PICTURE of the DAY

My grandson, Rory’s 1st day at school today!

Granddaughter Freya completed her first half day yesterday and loved every minute of it and then went to see the Tour of Britain Cycle Race pass through her village, putting life’s first lesson into practice: Live life to the full.

 

Rory left nursery for the final time yesterday and was presented with the Star of the Year Award. Well done, Rory, carry on through life like that and you won’t do too bad.

 

As I said yesterday, this is their first major step out into the big wide, world in their own right (or should it be write?). Yesterday and today is the start of probably a twenty year exciting journey and adventure of fulltime learning and building and achieving the DREAM!

 

My biggest wish, upon a star, is that Mamma and me can accompany you throughout this journey and see you reach your destination.

 

Now listen up Grandchildren, learning is an important skill. For best results absorb all and then process the information like the CPU of a computer. Hone your learning skills so that you instinctively learn the practical and useful and throw out the clutter.

 

I have never been able to financially afford the privilege of a university education but got my first promotion to Accounts Dept Manager after the University Graduate who had the job knew all the theory but did not have the experience, understanding or ability of the practicalities that I did.

 

Many of the poor and ridiculous decisions that are made in government, local government and large corporate bodies today illustrate that education can sometimes kill common sense.

Please bear this in mind.

 

My first day at school was immediately after my 5th birthday in April 1954. Mamma was the same age that George is now. But I didn’t know that, I didn’t even know she existed.

 

I had to travel 2 miles to school and 2 miles back even though there was a school 500 yards down the road. All due to catchment area rules. Yes, they were crazy in those far off days, too. It was a 1p normal service bus ride which unbelievably I was doing by myself within 6 months.

 

I don’t remember much about the first day except for a model of a seaside scene in the classroom which does stay vivid in my memory. There were beach huts and a train running a long side the beach and sea. I thought it was fantastic and craved to visit a seaside like this. I didn’t go on holiday until I was 14 years old and had just the odd day trip to Skegness, the furthest I had travelled was Cleethorpes. It was some 35 years later that I finally went to St. Ives and saw a seaside scene like this which I had dreamed of since that first day at school.

 

So, Grandchildren, they used to say, (I’m not too sure they do any more) that your school days are the happiest days of your life. Starting school was probably the happiest time of my childhood. I did not realise at the time but my parents were going through a horrendous time with their marriage on the rocks, ending with my dad leaving a couple of years later which devastated me and blew my childhood world to smithereens because I idolised him.

 

But do, do everything to make these days the best of your life, and hopefully that will give you a solid foundation that makes your later life even happier.

 

Be passionate about a subject and especially learning. People who have a passion tend to live longer and be more successful.

 

So, Rory and Freya (and Ewan and George), go for it, learn as much as you can of the right things and put it to good use. Have a dream and achieve it, reach for the stars but most of all love life and everything you do in it!

 

And read, read, read every book you can.

 

PICTURE OF THE DAY RORY ON HIS WAY TO SCHOOL FOR THE FIRST DAY

 

THURSDAY 7th SEPTEMBER 2017

 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

 

I've learned that even when I have pains, I don't have to be one. Maya Angelou

 

HAPPINESS IS…

 

Happiness is….discovering a 1960s record I've never heard before

 

GRANDAD’S ONE LINER JOKE OF THE DAY

 

Knowledge was never known to enter the head via an open mouth.

WEDNESDAY

6th SEPTEMBER 2017

 

ARE U JOKING, GRANDAD BLOG

&

GRANDAD'S

PICTURE of the DAY

 

 

 

FREYA & RORY START SCHOOL

 

We have four grandchildren: Rory, 4 years old and 5 at the beginning of October. Freya, 4 years old and 5 at Christmas. Ewan, 2 years old and 3 in February. George 1 year old and 2 next May.

 

There’s a lot going on this week because Rory and Freya are starting school.

 

 There are lots of different emotions at the moment The two children are so excited and ready for school. They need the stimulus. But at the same time a little daunting for them. This is probably their first major step carving a path through life for themselves.

 

Rory has spent one morning at school, but has gone to nursery regularly. Freya has attended her school in an afternoon since September to get her into going to school and she is feeling at ease with it. A scheme which I think is an excellent idea and should be introduced to all primary schools. Prohibited by finance again no doubt.

 

Although a big step for children they love the exciting challenge and adjust quickly. Although when Rory was just about four and his Mum and Dad first started talking about school and explaining he would have to leave nursery he was very apprehensive asking will I have to move to a different Mummy and Daddy. We quickly quelled his fears on that one.

 

When Freya began going to half day school, in September last year, she cried, (yet she very rarely cries) on Saturday and Sunday because Mum and Dad wouldn’t let her go to school. She so loves it.

 

Rory and Freya’s brothers who are far younger, sense there is something big going off but do not, quite what. Although, I think Ewan knows Rory is not going to nursery any more, but to school. The problem is he thinks wherever Rory goes he goes. So he too, thinks he’s off to school on Thursday. After all they have done everything together for all of Ewan’s life so far.

 

I think he may have a rude awakening come Thursday.

 

The children deal with any anxieties very quickly, but mum and dad’s nervousness and apprehensions and fears for their children are not so easy to quell, as they take time off from work to try and help ease their children through probably the biggest and most important day/week of their lives since being born.

 

Then, we as grandparents watch from the distance, having been here before and got the school shirts, with our grandchildren’s mothers. But now there’s not only what our daughters are going through to live through, but their husbands and our little grandchildren. So our concerns are six fold at the side of when our children went to school and we are not at the sharp end or hands on anything. Frustrating, although that’s life.

 

But in the words of Rabbi Lionel Blue, “It’ll pass”. As it will and going to school will all become part of day to day life that no one will give a second thought to. – Hopefully.

 

Note: Rory starts school Thursday. Freya starts school Wednesday.

 

The photograph of the day shows Freya going to school for the first afternoon last September. The photograph says it all. The long road of education and life she is setting out on, full of learning and adventure is laid out before her. What adventures and journeys will it take her and Rory and everyone else on? Everyone’s journey will be unique. It is so exciting.

 

 

SEPTEMBER 2017

WEDNESDAY 6th SEPTEMBER 2017

 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

 

"If the wind will not serve, take to the oars." - Latin Proverb

 

HAPPINESS IS…

 

Happiness is…a line full of washing blowing in the wind on a sunny day

 

GRANDAD’S ONE LINER JOKE OF THE DAY

 

My dad died when we couldn't remember his blood type. As he died, he kept insisting for us to "be positive," but it's hard without him.

 

Grandad's BLOG of the day Thought for Day Happiness is... Grandad's One Liner Jokes

TUESDAY 5th SEPTEMBER 2017

 

GRANDAD'S BLOG

&

PICTURE of the DAY

 

Last week grandchildren, Rory and Ewan took us to Chatsworth Farmyard and we had a tremendous time.

Ewan just loves farm animals it is his thing of the moment, although I see signs of it being a lifelong love.

Rory is blown away by all animals and was amazed and at both the goat and cow milking. He is hungry, no ravenous to learn and he learnt so much from these demonstrations.

Ewan is so into horses and has been as long as he has taken interest in anything. It’s his middle name, Philip, meaning lover of horses that he tries to live up to.

Is he destined to be a show jumper or a jockey or owner of stables or a stud or maybe just a gambler at the betting shop?

This meant his first stop was the huge Shire horse.

So when it came to the shop to buy a keepsake of the day, he obviously wanted a horse. He and Mamma chose a good solid perfect in every detail, moulded shire horse that fitted in his small hand beautifully. Boring!

I decided to buy him a nice plush fluffy toy one he could hug and love. That is what horses are all about. I showed him but then I dismissed the £29.99 ones. No, not because of the money. My grandson is worth every penny. But rejected on a value for money basis.

I found him a wonderful hand puppet of a grey horse. I showed him and he hysterically laughed at it. That’s the one for me I thought. It will beat Mamma’s gift to fits and at half the price of the other, £14.99. I felt so good, as a grandad should.

We bought Rory a farm set and checked out the pigs with many tiny little piglets, obviously newly born. Aaaah! And the cockerels. Then, back to the car for home. I tried giving Ewan the glove puppet but he hated it pushing it away. He turned his head away every time but clung dearly to the horse Mamma had bought him.

After five hours of intensive trying I conceded and decided I’d try to mitigate some of my losses by selling it on Amazon. I had trouble locating it, but finally found it by putting in the bar code number. To my horror it was not a horse but a donkey.

No wonder he laughed at me hilariously. It was not in joy at the animal it was at the stupidity of grandad thinking a donkey was a horse. And here I thought it was just on the electronics/IT side of life that he was more intelligent than me. Apparently not. On the equestrian side too.

And then Amazon will not let me sell it. They have issues on either quality, safety or content. So to cut my losses I will set up as a Children’s entertainer. Grandad with Donkey for your next birthday party. The perfect double act.

Anyone want to buy an unused donkey glove puppet, as good as a horse to the elderly and infirmed.

 

 

 

 

TUESDAY 5th SEPTEMBER 2017

 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

 

Watch something funny. Laughter is great medicine, especially for what worries you. Michelle Stewart,

 

HAPPINESS IS…

 

Happiness is….having a whole day with nothing planned and no commitments

 

GRANDAD’S ONE LINER JOKE OF THE DAY

 

How did Mary and Joseph know that Jesus weighed 4.2 kg? Cause they had a weigh in the manger.

 

 

 

 

MONDAY 4th SEPTEMBER 2017

 

GRANDAD'S BLOG

&

PICTURE of the DAY

 

All my life I have searched for my purpose in life and the meaning of life.

 

With my four grandchildren I have found all the answers and more besides.

 

I have found my, (no our: Mamma and Me) purpose in life is being GRANDPARENTS, it gives us the greatest satisfaction.

 

To become grandparents we have had to build a solid foundation of Husband & Wife, becoming Dad & Mum and finally, Mamma and Grandad.

 

The roll of grandparent is very different to that of parents. Our approach can be lighter with very little strictness. We allow the grandchildren to get away with murder and justify it.

 

But our main purpose is to put huge fun into our grandchildren’s lives helping to create memories for them that will last a life time and even longer.

 

Our objective is to give an added dimension to their lives that they cannot find any where else which allows them to experience and learn as much as possible about life, to ensure they are well equip to tackle all the challenges of life.

 

In a two way process, we pass on hard learned experiences whilst learning new things from them. Our aim is to help them achieve a well balanced satisfying life. We just want them to love life.

 

…And the meaning of life.

 

I think it is to raise children in such a way that they and their children and their children’s children to infinity work to make the world a better place (more so than ever these days) and for each generation to enhance the earth positively whilst it is in their custody.

 

…And to read books.

 

Our generation moved it forward in lots of ways but sorry, we messed up big on world peace and environmental issues.

 

So with that in mind we start a new chapter in www.jeanniejeanniejeannie.co.uk Grandad-Ewan 2 & George 1’s Blog today as we celebrate being a blog for one year.

 

TUESDAY 5th SEPTEMBER 2017

 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

 

"When teaching, light a fire, don't fill a bucket." Dan Snow

 

 

 

HAPPINESS IS…

 

Happiness is….setting out on an adventure

 

 

GRANDAD’S ONE LINER JOKE OF THE DAY

 

About a month before he died, my uncle had his back covered in lard. After that, he went down hill fast.

SUNDAY 3rd SEPTEMBER 2017

 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

 

Know your inner self. This means knowing who you are and what you represent. Be clear of your personal identity.

 

HAPPINESS IS…

 

Happiness is…buying your daughter the special celebratory book Dogger 40th Anniversary by Shirley Hughes 40th birthday, 40 years after it was first published and 40 years since you bought it for her the first time and her 4 year old son loving it too.

 

GRANDAD’S ONE LINER JOKE OF THE DAY

 

31. How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?

SATURDAY 2nd SEPTEMBER 2017

 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

 

Review your life. Set a weekly review to assess how you are doing for your goals. Review your purpose once every 3-6 months so that you know you're on the right path.

 

HAPPINESS IS…

 

Happiness is….driving all through night to meet a loved one

 

 

GRANDAD’S ONE LINER JOKE OF THE DAY

 

I intend to live forever. So far, so good.

 

<< New text box >>

FRIDAY 1st SEPTEMBER 2017

 

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

 

Let go of unhappy past. This means past grievances, heartbreaks, sadness, disappointments, and anger.

 

HAPPINESS IS…

 

Happiness is…a special pen

 

GRANDAD’S ONE LINER JOKE OF THE DAY

 

 Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

 

When I was a lad at school around 13 years old, our Maths teacher used to call me Wol. At the end of the year as we were moving up a class I plucked up courage to ask why he called me Wol. He told meit was thename of the deslexic owl in Winnie the Pooh. With my Harry Potter glasses he said I looked like the Wise Old Owl in the Winnie the Pooh stories.

 

Being the vain person I am I took it as a compliment

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