EWAN AND GEORGE TOGETHER SPECIAL
George and Ewan, being so young, are inquisitive and have loads of questions.They need answers, quick.
1 Why do I have to wait until I am one year+ old before I can stand and walk and baby lambs walk the day they are born?
2 Why, when I put in all the effort and get a packet of crisps from the goody cupboard, do they then take then off me before I can eat them?
3 Why if Superman is so smart does he wear his underpants over his trousers?
4 Why is pizza round but comes in a square box?
5 Why have I got no shoes?
6 Why is the expiry date on a packet of crisps is always on a Saturday?
7 Why don't I get a bottle once an hour on the hour?
8 Why not go over it or under it, it's boring going through it?
9 why do stars twinkle and how do they and the moon stay high in the sky?
10 Why does the sun refuse to shine when it is dark and the moon is out?
11 Why have a TV remote control and not let me, George, use it?
12 Why have electric cables and not let me, George, play with them and bite them?
13 Why if money doesn't grow on trees do banks have branches?
14 If a kid refuses to sleep during nap time, are they guilty of resisting a rest?
15 Can you daydream at night?
16 Why are me and Sister Freya the only prople without mobile phone?
17 Why? Just why?
18 Why aren't I given steak and chips?
19 Why is it dark when I go to sleep?
20 Why is there an Offside rule in football?
21 Why do I have one mum, one dad, one nanny, one mamma but 2 grandads?
22 Why do stars fall down from the sky, ev'ry time you walk by? (Lyric Close to You - Carpenters) Answer: Because you are so clumsy?
23 Why did they decide to have Christmas Day the day after Sister Freya's birthday?
24 Why, even though I am nearly one year old am I still the youngest in the family?
25 Why does our television only get sports programmes and Disney films?
AND A FEW ADDITIONAL QUESTIONS ABOUT THE COW JUMPING OVER THE MOON
1 Hey diddle diddle the cat and the fiddle the cow jumped over the moon WHY?
2 Because it made the little dog laugh WHY?
3 Because he just thought it was so funny WHY?
4 Because it's not everyday you see a cow jump over the moon and it caused it's udders to wobble WHY?
5 Because of aerodynamics WHY?
6 Because a cow would normally need a space ship to jump the moon WHY?
7 Because they are not the best jumpers in the world WHY?
8 Because they've never been trained WHY?
9 Because cows are not allowed entry into the Olympics not as spectators or high jumpers WHY?
10 Because they need milking twice a day WHY?
11 Because they produce so much milk WHY?
12 Because they eat so much grass WHY?
13 Because they have nothing better to do WHY?
14 Because they are not allowed to train and enter the Olympics high jump WHY?
15 Because they tend to do big poohs just where they stand WHY?
16 Because they've never been house trained WHY?
17 Because they do not live in the domestic house WHY?
18 Because they prefer cow sheds WHY?
19 Because they like to socialise with other cows WHY?
20 Because they have a lot to talk about WHY?
21 Because Hey diddle diddle the cat and the fiddle the cow jumped over the moon WHY?
22 Just BECAUSE - that's ******* why?
1 Why is there no "w" in "one", but there is a "w" in "two" and we don't use it?
2 Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
3 Why is it that rain drops but snow falls?
4 Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons
5 Why is the alphabet in that order? Is it because of that song "Now I know my ABC next time won't you sing with me?"
6 Why is the sky blue?
7 Why is a boxing ring square?
8 Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?
9 Why do my feet smell and my nose runs?
10 If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
11 Why did Sally sell seashells on the seashore when you can just pick them up for free anyway?
12 Do vegetarians eat animal crackers?
13 Why is the word for "a fear of long words," hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia, so long?
14 Why isn’t the number 11 pronounced onety one?
15 Why is throwing a ball in the house forbidden but mum can throw a party?
16 Why doesn't anyone understand me when I talk?
17 Why am I not allowed to roam the streets?
18 Why do I get stuck in my car seat and can't get out?
19 Why are Angry Birds so angry?
20 Why does Y come before Z but after X in the alphabet
21 Why was there 10 in the bed?
22 Why are adult books made of flimsy paper instead of board and worst of al why do they have no flaps to lift?
23 Why are Rory's toys always better than mine?
24 Why is Thomas the Tank Engine blue?
25 Why is Big Bad Mouse in the Gruffalo so lovable?
1 Why did the wheels on the bus go round and round
2 Because the driver turnedon the engine, took off the brake and pressed the accelorator - WHY?
3 Because his passengers wanted to go to the shops in the town? WHY?
4 Because computers and the internet had not been invented yet. WHY?
5 Because Steve Jobs, Bill Gates and Robert Kahn had not been born yet. WHY?
6 Because their mums and dads had not got it together WHY?
7 Because people were slower to be attracted to one another WHY?
8 Because there was no computer dating WHY?
9 Because computers and the internet had not been invented yet. WHY?
10 Because Steve Jobs, Bill Gates and Robert Kahn had not been born yet. WHY?
11 Because their mums and dads had not got it together WHY?
12 Because the female had to wait for the man to ask her out WHY?
13 Because of etiquette WHY
14 Because mums and dads ruled and everyone was God fearing WHY?
15 Because there was no Social Media such as Facebook & Twitter WHY?
16 Because at that time dinosaurs roamed the earth and ate up all the mobile phones and knocked down the communication towers pylons WHY?
17 Because the dinosaur's did it as a protest because they knew there days were numbered and were scheduled to become extinct Why?
18 Because man was about to be inventeded WHY
19 Because he was needed to invent the wheel WHY?
20 Because the Bus needed wheels to go round and round
21 Why did the wheels on the bus go round and round
22 Just BECAUSE - that's ******* why?
20 SONGS THAT ARE ABOUT "WHY"
1 Why - Anthony Newley
2 Why Annie Lennox
3 Why Can't A Woman Be More Like A Man? - Cast of My Fair Lady
4 Why Can't I Be You? - The Cure
5 Why Can't We Live Together - Timmy Thomas
6 Why Do Fools Fall In Love? - Frankie Lymon & the Teenagers
7 Why Do Girls Love Horses? - Adam Ant
8 Why Do I Keep Counting? - The Killers
9 Why Does It Always Rain On Me? - Travis
10 Why Does It Hurt When I Pee? - Frank Zappa
11 Why Don't We Do It In The Road? - The Beatles
12 Why Don't You Love Me - Beyoncé
13 Why I Sing the Blues - B.B. King
14 Why Walk When You Can Run - Paul Weller
15 Why Do Lovers Break Each Others Hearts - Showaddywaddy
16 Why Must We Fall In Love _ Diana Ross Supremes & temptations
17 Why Oh Why Oh Why - Gilbert O'Sullivan
18 Why Can't This Be Love - Van Halen
19 Tell Me Why - The Beatles
20 Don't Know why - Norah Jones
When I was a lad at school around 13 years old, our Maths teacher used to call me Wol. At the end of the year as we were moving up a class I plucked up courage to ask why he called me Wol. He told meit was thename of the deslexic owl in Winnie the Pooh. With my Harry Potter glasses he said I looked like the Wise Old Owl in the Winnie the Pooh stories.
Being the vain person I am I took it as a compliment
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